Good news and more waiting
This morning started with a call from the nurse navigator from the Riverside Breast Specialists. They need to postpone our Second Opinion clinic appointment until next Wednesday since they need more time to review the pathology. I told her I didn’t want to wait and I wanted to know what the pathologists needed more time to study. She said she would let Dr. Lilly know.
10 minutes later Dr. Lilly (love him!) called me back himself. He said that the pathologists at Riverside do not agree with the original pathology report from Mount Carmel. They are sending for additional pathology slides from Mount Carmel to do a complete examination. Dr. Lilly could not tell me what they were seeing but just that they were not seeing that it is Invasive Ductal Carcinoma from the slides that they have. The results will make a difference on if we need to do a lumpectomy or mastectomy. So, more waiting and then the question of which interpretation of the pathology do I trust? This is science and medicine, isn’t there some kind of standardized protocol? I guess mistakes happen but, jeez!
He did have good news from my biopsy yesterday. The spot on my left breast came back as benign. At least I’m not completely littered with cancer. One cancer is better than two, right? I hope the pathologists didn’t make a mistake on this one too.
I also heard from my employer today. I am supposed to start work at the end of August but I went ahead and notified them of the situation because I was making myself crazy with the possibility of losing the job. There is a good possibility that they (the boss and director of personnel) are cursing my name once they get off the phone but they are being quite nice to me. I will be able to take a medical leave of absence for the time I need for recovery from surgery. I acknowledge that this is not a good way to start a career but I signed the contract for employment before I knew and I swear I did not plant some cancer in order to avoid joining the labor pool for another year. Jeffrey has already spent my first year’s salary in his head so I’m very happy I can keep the job. Actually, I hope to have the worst of this behind me in the next month or so and since both kids will be in school I don’t want to sit around thinking about how cancer ruined my year. I have a job that I’m excited about and I’ve been working on this since I was pregnant with Amira. I want to work and I’m glad they will hold the job for me. I’m just going to have to work extra hard to earn respect when I finally do show up for my first day.
I took these two bits of good news (benign left side and job) and packed a picnic lunch for the kids for after Amira’s speech appointment today. We had a great day at the park and I joined them in playing freeze tag and hunting butterflies. I had to take phone calls from 5 different people at various doctor’s offices and labs while we all try to sort out the puzzle but I was able to take the phone calls and then let it go. It was nice to feel peace and hope even if it’s just for the afternoon.